I (36F) and my husband (43M) have been together for almost 5 years, married for 1 year. He is my soulmate. The love of my life.
At the beginning of our relationship we had an issue of infidelity. He was having an affair with a woman and I found out right after celebrating our first pregnancy. He apologized, we went to therapy, he changed a lot of his actions and we were really getting to a good place.
Approximately 3 months after the birth of our daughter I had went through his phone because of a gut feeling I was having. I then found exactly what I was expecting, he was texting another woman. It wasn’t anything too crazy so eventually I was able to forgive him. We put so much effort into our relationship and our family.
We got married in 2024. Started trying to have baby #2. We were doing so much better together. Communicating more, showing each other affection and getting back to our old version of us. The happy us. The playful us. In December we decided to try an open relationship. There were things I felt I couldn’t do for him as well as things he couldn’t or wouldn’t do for me. So we each went down the dating path. He started dating a client and I started dating a good family friend. After approximately 2 weeks he decided he didn’t want to be open any longer. He said it was to hard to watch me passionately kiss another man. I understood so I ended my relationship with the family friend and he ended his with his client.
Now this brings us to last week. I woke up Friday morning to text messages from friends, family and strangers with a screenshot of a picture of my husband that had been posted to a “Are we dating the same guy” facebook page. A girl was claiming she had been dating him and something had seemed off. So I immediately messaged the girl he had been dating while we were open and found out a lot of things I never wanted to hear along with things I didn’t want to see. This girl is one of them woman that goes after taken men just to prove something. She treated me awful. She said some of the nastiest things about me. Anything she could say to hurt me she did.
She sent me videos of her and my husband having sex at his work. 20 or more photos of them together. Text messages between them. He said and did such awful things. Things I just can’t seem to get out of my head. He called me his practice wife and he couldn’t get it up to have sex with me even if he wanted to. He called her all the pet names he calls me. She called him the pet names I have always called him by. I was completely devastated. This had been going on for four months. He basically begged for her back right after we ended our open situation and decided to tell her that we were just roommates all of a sudden.
Now as of today I am 2 weeks late on my period. After Many tests I have had both negative and faint positive results. My Doctor assumes I’m approximately 5 weeks pregnant. I’m having a blood test done tomorrow to confirm if I am pregnant or not.
So what do I do? This man is my world. We have a 2 year old and a possible baby on the way. I’m far from my family. I want to be with my husband more than anything. I would accept any situation where honesty was number one. We all are human. We have flaws. So If you need to go sleep with someone just come to me. We will figure anything out together. But I’m terrified that that will never be the case. He will be a serial cheater. Can I live with that for the sake of my children? Or do I leave for the sake of my children?
I don’t think I can leave. I have too much love for this man and have been through so much with him. He is the one who helped me find my worth and become a more confident version of myself. He takes very good care of me and our family. he is a sole provider as I am currently a stay at home mom. So I guess what do I do???? Even better how do I stay????
